ganymede is not an orange cow (or why i love non-sequitur)

It is June.

I have an excuse.

Statement 1: I have exams.

Statement 2: I hate exams.

It follows that Statement 2 is true only if Statement 1 is true.

Thus, does Statement 1 = Statement 2?

Following that, does T = V?

So, is TV = TT?

And Television = Table Tennis?

Each question is worth (Pi*g)/t(n+1)(0.95), where g is gravitational acceleration, n is the number of letters in the first word of the question and t follows the Student's t-distribution.

You have 10 minutes and 43 seconds. Compute or die.